An Addicts Wish List

An Addict’s Wish List (#5 is So True!)



Loving an addict is exhausting. If you’ve ever had to watch as drugs physically and mentally destroy a loved one, then that statement hits home in a very visceral way…especially if you’ve never personally struggled with an addiction.

From an outsider’s perspective, addiction is a disease that literally makes no sense. As addicts, so many of the choices we make are destructive and our actions generally reek of selfishness.

This disease forces its victims to operate in a warped kind of survival mode that never seems to end. If you could trade places with an addicted loved one, you’d probably be swept away by the river of emotions you encountered.

To understand addict behavior is a step in the right direction, so it’s important to try to grasp – at least on some level – what your loved one is feeling.

Since mind readers only exist in the movies, a little help and insight can go a long way…especially when you’re trying to get inside the mind of an addict. While we all have unique thoughts, there’s a universal list of wishes and dreams that are unique to people struggling with addiction. If you could take a peek inside the mind of a loved one and discover a list of the things we privately wish we could share or help you understand, here’s the rest of the list would look a little something like this..



#1: We Wish…

#2: We Wish…

There’s a little voice inside every addicts head that says things like “just one pill and all the nausea, vomiting, diarrhea and joint pain will stop” or “one drink will stop the sweating and body tremors.” Sometimes, it’s just too hard to block that voice out and power through the sickness.

#3: We Wish…

Functioning addicts get up, go to work, get decent grades, take care of the kids and, all the while, feed rapidly growing addictions. We’re so embarrassed to be in this shape that we work doubly hard to hide it from you. We act like everything is fine. In truth, our lives are quietly falling apart.

#4: We Wish…

Disappointing you is devastating. We wanted to be sons and daughters you could be proud of; we know we’re failing in that respect. Day after day, the pain and hurt in your eyes cuts us like a knife. Self-medicating is the only way we think we can avoid dealing with that pain.


#5: We Wish…

As addicts, we convince ourselves that no one knows how sick we really are. We tell ourselves that you haven’t noticed the flood of overdue bills that come in the mail, the overdrawn bank accounts or the jewelry that we’ve pawned for drug money. In truth, we know we’re not doing you any favors by hiding our disease; we’re just not strong enough to welcome the life-saving help we need.

#6: We Wish…

We’ve learned to manipulate the people we love and it’s all in the name of feeding our habit. We know how to tug at your heartstrings and convince you to give in. What we really need, however, is for you to say no. One day, we’ll thank you for it.

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#7: We Wish…

Addiction is not just a physical thing. Much of this disease hinges on mental and emotional issues. We’re constantly experiencing waves of sadness and depression that make sobriety seem like an impossible feat.


#8: We Wish…

No matter what our intentions, as long as we are active in addiction, we inflict pain on the very people who love us the most. The hurt we cause you makes us hate ourselves. Every time we look in the mirror, we’re disgusted…and so very sorry.

#9: We Wish…

One of our largest enemies is fear. It keeps us stagnant in our disease and convinces us that we don’t deserve a better life. Fear whispers in our ears, assuring us that recovery is an option that has long since sailed. It wants nothing more than to convince us that it’s no longer worth trying.

#10: We Wish…

Addiction has a funny way of distorting our thoughts and, worse, robbing us of our happy memories. This disease creeps into the fabric of a person’s identity and alters our brain chemistry. With a brain that no longer produces its own endorphins, happiness eventually turns into a myth.

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#11: We Wish…

Despite fighting you every step of the way – kicking and screaming – each and every one of us wants to be called out on our behaviors. All that chaos we create? That’s just a ridiculous defense mechanism. If you can find the strength to look past that initial outburst and firmly remind us that we are loved, we are worth saving and you’ll be damned before you let us go another day without seeking help…there’s nothing better we could wish for.

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Lost another friend to the needle and the spoon…….

I found out the other day that I lost another dear friend to this disease. I will be venting in another post about it in a few days, but for now listen to this song and message. Peace towards your journey!!!

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Posted in addict, addiction, Awareness

The Light…….


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Posted in Inspirational quotes

A report from the Pike….


I have been busy for a while and now I am back out in Texas helping out with my friend. I still try to keep in touch with some people back in Florida after all it is my birthplace and home and I guess it always will be.

Saying that I also try to keep in contact with some of the people out at the Pike! I have not heard much good news about some of the folks out there but then again this does not surprise me for an addicts life is always a struggle.

I got a text the other day from Granny saying, “Please call me it is important!” So I called her while I was out clearing some land. She had bad news for me about another friend that I call Long Hair! She had relapse and overdose, now in the hospital slipped into a coma and from what she told me gang green has sent in and now they are going to have to amputate her legs!

My heart drop for I really care for my friend Long Hair! I told Granny to not to take it so personally, for she was with her while this happen and I did not want her to go over the edge herself! Long Hair family is blaming her for this when in fact it is the disease that has done this to her. I understand all the hurt and frustration from the families sides that have gone through the pain and suffering that addiction has put them in.

Saying that all my prayers go out to these people and with Gods help we all can learn and find a way through these trials. There is a time for everything in life, for our happiness, for our sorrow’s and even death itself. This is why I have and you should choose to live in victory, in true freedom and liberty break those chains of addiction and live with purpose not in a lie.

I am going to cut to the chase and make this one short and simple because after all I am really a simple man. Family members remember that love is your weapon and that God is with you. And for the addicts, remember this, God did not create you to live in a lie and sorrow and struggles! He created you to live with purpose and to live in victory with Him. He gives us free will, the choice is yours and yours only. I pray that all choose the later. To that Gods speed and peace to all :-)

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Posted in addiction, Recovery

Exercise is the key to health and recovery….

good feeling

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Posted in Inspirational quotes, Recovery

What I’ve learned…….


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Posted in Inspirational quotes, Love

None of my business……

no bodys business

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Posted in Inspirational quotes
Today is the present.
March 2015
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Robert Christopher Mergupis


Robert Christopher Mergupis

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