I am your disease.
I hate meetings. I hate Higher Power. I hate anyone who has a program. To all who come in contact with me, I wish you death and suffering. Allow me to introduce myself, I am the disease of addiction. Cunning, baffling, and powerful. That’s me. I’ve killed millions and I am pleased. I love to catch you with the element of surprise. I love pretending I’m your friend and lover. I have given you comfort have I not? Wasn’t I there when you were lonely? When you wanted to die didn’t you call me? I was there. I love to make you hurt. I love to make you cry. And better yet I love when I make you so numb you can neither hurt not cry. You can’t feel anything at all. This for me is true glory. I will give you instant gratification and all I ask of you is long time suffering. I’ve been there for you always. When things were going right in life you invited me. You said you didn’t deserve these good things and I was the only one who agreed with you. Together we were able to destroy all good things in your life.
People don’t take me seriously. They take strokes seriously heart attacks seriously even diabetes. Fools that they are they don’t know that without my help these things would not be made possible.
I am such a hated disease yet I do not come uninvited. U choose to have me. So many have chosen me over reality and peace.
More than u hate me I hate all of you who have a 12 step program. Your meetings your higher power all weakens me.
Now I must lie here quietly you dot see me but I am here growing bigger than ever. When you only exist I can live. When you live, I can only exist. But I am here… And until we meet again, if we meet again I wish you death and suffering.
This helped me when I first got sober to see the disease for what it really is. 9 months sober and going stronger but for the Grace of God.