Hello, I pray you are having a super fantastic day or evening what ever the case may be while you are reading this post. This blog was created to help bring awareness about addiction. Not just addiction itself but something that tugs at the strings to my heart. And this is how young ladies get caught up into this epidemic in this world and the abuse that they go through.
Is it full of drama? You bet it is, so what, when you have passion for a cause a true warrior don’t care and give up. They deal with it at all cost! This blog is also about the author and some of his trails and journey that he is on and that is what this post is about today.
In my journey I have learned and grown, sadly some don’t and they stay stuck in the same rut of their addiction. Most times they even get more dependent on the substance that they are addicted too! My latest addiction was over my friend Angel Face, you see I am madly in love with her and even now when she has been out of my life for over a year now, I still think about her everyday.
Now just as I was sitting here in McDonald’s there was this young lady with a little boy of six months old next to me. She had the long black hair and even wear the same kind of clothing as she did. This is what has inspire me today to write this and were I am currently at with my state of mind. Yes no doubt I miss her company and yes it is safe to say I love her.
I love her and she has this place in my heart that only a few have touch. Now that she is gone I have had time to think why I love her and if love and opportunity ever presents itself I will tell her if she asks and wants to know for that is only normal for a woman to know why a man loves her. Sadly most cases they don’t even know! And then that just goes to prove if they don’t know, then they don’t love!
But one thing I can share with you is that I love her enough to let here have her choice and freedom. This has always been our boundaries in our relationship as friends and I have always honor that. Even as a friend being stuck in the “friend zone” was still rewarding for me. I would like to believe that the feeling was mutual at least that is what she shared with me last time I did talk to her.
There was some draw backs still being friends with her, and I generally over look them. Watching her go through her struggles and pains with her addiction and how she dealt with it was painful for me, I did know that this was not who she truly was, at least this is not what I saw in her. Sadly not everyone had the same vision as I did. What they saw was a very attractive young lady that they could exploit for their own self-gratification!
I was not her man so there forth I could not tell her what to do only adviser her at times. Even with this I can honestly say, while she was with me she was protected and I did enjoy having that position even for a short time. This was very addictive for me, and if she every does come back into my life I have learned not to be an enabler towards her addiction. The boundaries will be different and narrower, for if any women in my life will have to trust me and surrender to me believing that I want whats best for her.
She knew this an did not want it but I did so she was not ready yet for a real mans love to help guide her trough recovery. Once she does decide, I will be there for her and she knows this. To provide a Safe Harbor for her to be able to set her goals and seek true peace and love.
Yes it is very easy to be tempted and seductive by her beauty, but I have come to learn and understand that there is a greater beauty in her. This is her soul and spirit which is far more than her looks and if you would see her you would say wow she is hot and beautiful, but you don’t even really know her real beauty from within as I do and if you had my vision you would understand why it was so easy to overlook the dark-side of her habits and addiction.
Recognizing this I pray I will be able to do the right thing for her, to understand what is truly at stake with this beautiful soul and to be able to share with her journey will be a pure pleasure for me, even with all the drama!
So is Plato correct when he said “Love is a mental disease” or what? Is it a form of addiction?
Peace to all on your journey 🙂